August 24, 2020
Sometimes it's easier to beat yourself up for failure than to pat yourself on the back for trying.
I get it.
I think it’s something most—if not all—self-proclaimed perfectionists do and struggle with often. It’s no wonder. We’ve been conditioned to believe failure is bad, so the obvious thing to do is the impossible—avoid it. Often times, that behavior is deeply ingrained—an old, well-nurtured habit and mindset pattern that was form log ago. This, I’ve come to believe, is more destructive than failing.
BECAUSE IF WE'RE NOT FAILING, WE'RE NOT TRYING.
We have to be willing to try.
We have to be willing to do something without guarantees.
We have to be willing to risk embarrassment, rejection, discomfort, challenges, starting over, reevaluating what we thought would work, and keep going.
WE HAVE TO RISK FAILURE.
I still struggle with this mindset shift at times. It’s tricky, but not impossible to rewire. We have to recondition the mind. We have to practice and implement new thoughts, ideas, and behaviors. We have to always be seeking ways to improve ourselves, because, positive, purposeful growth, along with practicing gratitude, are the only ways to true fulfillment.
I am so grateful for the many influencers, educators, and personal development mentors who have helped extract all these truths from me; those that have paved the way, successfully, and are willing to share for those willing to listen.
It’s not easy.
But it’s worth it.
Just remember to give yourself grace with setbacks. Acknowledge what and how you’re feeling, then ask yourself:
“What have I failed at today?”
Then, applaud yourself for trying.
“When I was a child, my father used to encourage my brother and me to fail. At the dinner table, instead of asking about the best part of our day, he would ask us what we failed at that week. If we didn’t have something to tell him, he would be disappointed. When we shared whatever failure we’d endured, he’d high-five us and say, ‘Way to go!’ The gift my father gave us by doing this was redefining what failure truly meant.” – Sara Blakely